Interrogating The Meaning Of The Angry Gay White Male Art Nazis Of The whiteartworld™ Through An Alternate Reading Of “Ground Swell” By Edward Hopper.

When Blake Gopnik, The World’s Smartest Art Critic ™, and Alexander Nemerov, The World’s Only Art Critic Who's Federally Licensed To Think Outside The Box ™, get together for drinks over a painting by Edward Hopper, you can rest assured that the bullshit is going to be piled higher and deeper than any PhD art critic has ever imagined.

And so, let the art critic bullshit flow...

Floating Receiver

Nemerov asks if the buoy, "with its interior sounding mechanism and its pattern of struts," might even echo the look of a classic 1930s radio.

Edward Hopper
Ground Swell
1939
Oil on canvas - 93x127cm

Corcoran Gallery of Art

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Of course, there are alternate readings of "Ground Swell" that might explain the curious intersection of pre-World War II German Nazi ideology with contemporary American cultural values:

Operation whiteartworld™

Interrogating the meaning of the angry gay white male art Nazis of the whiteartworld™ through an alternate reading “Ground Swell” by Edward Hopper.

As Hitler and his cronies planned the invasion of Poland, a cynical cabal of rich angry gay white male Nazi sympathizers who held positions of power within the liberal cultural institutions of America hatched a secret plan to make abstract paintings by angry gay white male Nazi artists the only legitimate form of painting that would be supported by American art museums.

This conspiracy, code named Operation whiteartworld™, was formulated in 1939 onboard a sailboat owned by Edward Hopper.

In his famous painting, “Ground Swell,” Hopper renders the images of the chief conspirators that implemented, with Adolf Hitler’s direct approval, Operation whiteartworld™.

From left to right in the painting we see the rich angry gay white male Nazi art critic, and noted anti-Semite, Clement Greenberg, steering the whiteartworld™ vessel on its charted course toward destiny while listening intently to radio/buoy for coded radio transmissions from Berlin authorizing the initiation of Operation whiteartworld™.

Standing in front of Clement Greenberg is the rich angry gay white male Nazi painter, Willem de Kooning, who is pictured in a stunned moment after having just been informed by Dr. Paul Joseph Goebbels, leader of the NSDAP's propaganda machine, that Jackson Pollock had been personally selected by Hitler to lead the advance of the assault on the definition of modernist painting in America.

Lying on her stomach in front of de Kooning is the rich bi-sexual harlot of the American Nazi Art Empire, Peggy Guggenheim. Hopper captures the exact moment when de Kooning exclaimed to Guggenheim, “Ha! To make that silly prick famous you’ll have to fuck him more than once, Peggy, and good luck with that honey, because everybody in New York knows that Pollock is a drunk that can’t get it or his brush up!”

And, finally, holding onto the mast is the angry gay white male Nazi artist Jackson Pollock himself, rendered in a moment of deep introspection by Hopper in which he Pollock is contemplating the aesthetic and moral implications of Goebbels directive ordering him to “spill paint in America in the same fashion we’re spilling blood in Europe.”

Although he cannot be seen in this painting without Superman vision, x-ray analysis conducted by curators at the National Gallery of Art recently revealed that Hopper painted over a poor African American folk artist from the South who is pictured chained down below in the galley preparing lunch for the rich angry white art Nazis up top who are basking in the dawn of the new sunlight of the whiteartworld™ for whites only that will soon spread is modernist ideology from sea-to-shining-sea across the fascist American Empire.

* Historical Note: The conspiracy of angry gay white male art Nazis eventually merged with homosexual elements of the La Costa Nostra to form the Gay Art Mafia. The angry gay white male Nazi F.B.I. director, J. Edgar Hoover, for decades denied the existence of the Gay Art Mafia. Hoover, however, could no longer pretend that the Gay Art Mafia did not exist following the assassination of President Kennedy by an angry gay white male art Nazi from New Orleans named Lee Harvey Oswald.